Yes, I’m mad! Ticked off! Angry as all h*ll!
The last few weeks, I have been dealing with some health issues. Last week, I found out that one of them is life-threatening. (Treatable, though, thank God.)
In coming to terms with all this, I have discovered some particularly ugly lies that have been part of my life foundation since I was a child. (I think sometimes that the worst thing you can do to a child is raise them in church. They pick up so many lies that way!)
Here’s what I found in me: as a child, I heard that ‘the flesh’ is wicked or evil or something to be put down, controlled so it won’t take over, etc, etc. And that’s all from scripture, but, the way I understood it is not scriptural at all! As a result of my childish understanding, I spent my whole life thinking of my body as a ‘necessary evil’ – something that had to be tolerated so I could move around on the planet, but definitely worthless beyond that.
So, I neglected my body for the most part. Sure, when I was pregnant and nursing, I ate right, exercised, took naps and stuff. But the rest of the time . . . well, it’s just something to be tolerated. By the time the MIHM told me he wanted me gone, I had gained 100 pounds, and was not doing anything about it. (Depression will do that to you. And hopelessness.) The first year after we split up, I lost 70 of that. And had to have my gall bladder out. After that, there were some minor health issues here and there, but nothing major; nothing that made me look at this lie.
A few months ago, Father God began working on this belief, though. (Which I thank Him for, as it has been easier to deal with this health issue because of the truths I’ve already learned.) He began to show me that our physical body is important to Him. Not just because He made it, either (I still wonder why, but He hasn’t showed me that yet). He showed me that Christ’s sacrifice for us took place on a physical level as well as a spiritual one, because our bodies are important. His resurrection was not just spiritual, but physical, too. In fact, Paul says somewhere that if the resurrection is not true, ‘we are of all men most miserable’. So, our bodies are important! They are just as important as our hearts/souls and our spirits! Father God intends for our whole being – body, soul, spirit – to live with Him forever.
And that’s why I’m mad! Oh, not because I hate the physical body (I no longer do), but because for so many years I hated my body. Because I believed this lie, I never appreciated my body for the marvelous machine that it is. I didn’t take care of it, didn’t feed or maintain it properly. I treated it with disdain, even disgust! I cheated my body out of years of respect and care, because I felt it was only to be tolerated, as it was basically so sinful. And now, I am paying the price. You can ignore proper maintenance on any machine for only so long, before it starts breaking down. Years of neglect, of stress and emotional pain are taking a toll. First the gall bladder, now this. (And yes, I do believe in healing – I can find no time limit on “by His stripes we are healed.”)
I’m so angry at this lie I believed for so long! Every time Father God shows me a lie I’ve believed, it makes me angry. I gotta tell you, there are times when I can’t wait for the end of this whole creation, when satan gets thrown into the lake of fire. I want to be there, to kick him hard as he goes past! (Where’s a pair of really pointed-toed boots?)
If you are going to teach doctrine to children, for heaven’s sake (and theirs) teach them what it means. Teach them that ‘the flesh’ does not mean their body, it means the ungodly/worldly/sinful attitudes, behaviors and beliefs that we need to exchange for Godly ones. Teach them that ‘love one another’ does not mean allow someone to abuse you. Teach them that there are a lot of things God hates, not just divorce. Teach them . . . sorry, I could go on for a very long time here.
The point is that children do not understand things the way adults do! Keep that in mind as you lay their foundations, whatever the facet. And listen to them, so you can understand what they believe, and correct the lies before they become embedded for life. Because once they are embedded, we no longer see them! They become so much a part of us that we don’t even know they are there, and don’t see how they are controlling our lives. Thankfully, our Father God loves us too much to leave them in there forever, but they can do a lot of damage before they are rooted out.
May Father God show you the lies you have believed, replacing them with His truth and the freedom it brings!